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Boundaries

Boundaries are difficult for some people due to the lack of appropriate boundaries in their childhood and youth. If you haven’t seen and experienced healthy boundaries it can be difficult to enforce them as an adult, especially if your parents do not have healthy boundaries themselves. 

How do you develop good personal boundaries? One method is through close work with a good therapist. They will help you navigate through your own boundaries and establish which boundaries should be yours and which ones aren’t important to you. Care must be taken to ensure you are achieving your personal sense of self and not someone else’s idea of what that should look like. 

For example, I don’t allow onions in my home because of an allergy. For someone else, this is a non-issue. It would not be ethical for me to suggest this to a client as n appropriate boundary for them.

Why do I need good boundaries? I am glad you asked. Boundaries help us separate ourselves from others and help us avoid being taken advantage of by others. They are especially important when you’re processing and dealing with feelings of anxiety, anger, and unhappiness. 

Lack of boundaries keeps us from being our authentic selves and only when we can live in authenticity can we truly feel like our best selves.

The most difficult part of redefining boundaries is ourselves, learning to be firm about our boundaries is difficult, especially when using them with family members who have previously enjoyed a life boundary free. Once you start to enforce your boundaries, you can begin enjoying the freedom of taking care of yourself and your needs.

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